You obviously don't deserve it.... Part 1

Between the heated console wars and the fresh release of a new Instagram app I can't help but think: You obviously don't deserve it.

Today Facebook had a big press conference and released a new Instagram app.  The new app is the same as the old app, BUT IT ADDS VIDEO!  This is important because Facebook has been directly competing with Twitter recently to steal your social life.  Twitter released a little gem called Vine.  Vine allows you to post 6-second videos to the web.  Yes, SIX ENTIRE SECONDS.  Those have to be some unbelievably amazing seconds to bother posting them on the internet, right?  WRONG.  The key difference here between the two apps is going to be the length of the videos.  Instagram now allows you to post 15-second clips... right to Instagram.  Now you can take a short video of that meal that you just took a picture of.  OH BOY!

While I am all for "social" and I love pushing technology forward.... how fucking self-centered can you fucking be?  What makes anyone that isn't a beautiful woman think that anyone gives flying fuck what it is that they do all day?  Beyond that, why would they ever want to see small 15-second snippets that they find meaningful, artistic or awesome?  The fact that a single app exists, I don't understand.  The fact that now there are two competing apps for this... HOLY FUCKING SHIT!  Yet, somehow I live in a world where I am in a minority without a college degree.  I'm obviously not cultured enough to understand.

The reason why they don't deserve it?  Because hordes of Android users have been filling up message boards and spewing vile shit all over the ratings FOR HOURS.  Why?  Because the app doesn't work?  Nah.  Because it makes their phone explode?  Nah.  Because I sends naked pictures to their grandmother?  Nope.  Because they didn't read the description and requirements for the fucking application?  BINGO!

People didn't bother to read the part where it requires a specific Android version number to use this new feature.  You can watch it from any version, but you must have the latest version to take video.  Obviously the well-educated masses that are sheepishly following this trend aren't all going to have new-ish smartphones.  It's a cruel world out there with no 15-second videos, guys.  Facebook seems to be working on a version that is more widely compatible, it will probably be available very soon.  Until then we will drown in a sea of tears of the Gingerbread masses.

Thoughts from E3 (2013)

E3 has wrapped and all of the big sites are hyping the next big thing and drooling over trailers than don't represent the game, I aim to provide as much REAL opinion as I was able to piece together.  I am going to cover some of the games that I am looking forward to and some of the dirt that was dished on them over this week.  Obviously, I'm only going to be touching on the things important to PC gaming.  If you want to listen to fanboys argue and bitch about the consoles, you'll need to go somewhere else...

The Division

This game makes me so fucking excited.  It is a shooter.  It is an RPG.  It is a.... seamless multiplayer experience?  WTF?!  It looks like Borderlands that isn't boring as fuck.  Skills and a system that pits players versus... OTHER PLAYERS?!  Gasp!  Watching the video for this hurt my heart once I realized that it wasn't coming to the PC.  If we miss out on this, this will be a huge disappointment.  There are a lot of people who would really enjoy it.  There are a lot of people who are looking for a reason to not have to invest in another Battlefield or CoD game.  Trust me.

Titanfall

Titanfall looks like another MMOFPS.  What sets it apart is its unique PlanetSide-esque setting combined with Unreal Tournament styled physics and maneuvering.  And... oh yeah, THAT HUGE FUCKING MACHINE.  Riding around in that fucker looks like some beastmode shit.  While I won't be playing this I think a lot of people would enjoy checking out a shooter like this.  Mixing in some huge mechs just means that you will inspire a different group to jump on board, too.


The Witcher 3

This game.  Wow.  The first two games were great.  Though I've honestly not given the second game a large amount of time, I'm not sure it needs it.  The awards and praise for the game are incredibly high.  The portions I have had the chance to play have been great.  I can only hope that his game will allow me to collect EVEN SEXIER CARDS!  Mmm, conquests!  The game looks awesome.  The trailer didn't give up a whole lot, but it looks promising.  Based on other works by these guys, my hopes are high.  Based on the previous games... they're even higher.  They even released some information after E3 letting people know that the PC version will get some free DLC that the consoles won't be able to enjoy ( because they don't allow free DLC... o.O ).

Watch Dogs

Again?!  Come the fuck on.  I get the same shit, AGAIN?!  This GTA meets Deus Ex game had my attention last year.  This year, not so much.  I won't say that I was disappointed, but I will say that I expected to see more than I did.  Ugh.  Hopefully as the launch creeps up and gets closer we will be provided with more footage and a better idea of how the game will end up.


Thief

A new Thief game?  Yes, please!  I am a little concerned how this will pan out, based on the drastic departure from the originals that the last game was.  I do have faith, however.  What I was able to see and read from E3 was very promising.  While the AI seemed like it was either made up of fucking geniuses or half-brained inbred fuckwads, the gameplay was compelling.  The stealth felt mostly realistic and the arrows felt... promising.  A lot of work still needs to be put into the game for a finish product, but kudos for at least putting it out there to play, unlike... pretty much everyone else.


Dragon Age: Inquisition

I love Dragon Age.  I love the idea of this game.  I love the trailer.  It gets me excited.  After the backlash that they faced with the second game, I am not anticipating much out-side-the-box thinking this time around.  I expect a straight forward narrative that I can follow on an epic quest to complete a nearly impossible task.  I accept the challenge and hope for more of what made the first one so good.


Destiny

I still don't understand.  The gameplay makes it seem like it is going to be some kind of RAGE meets Borderlands type of game.  A fast-paced, action-driven MMOFPS game.  The gameplay trailer didn't really show off a lot of anything we haven't seen.  It looks like it has public events like WAR, it looks like it has a leveling system akin to every RPG ever.  The weapons level?  Some people have force powers???  I... what?  I don't fucking understand.  I am going to need a serious FAQ on this game.  I can't tell if it is good or bad.  I can't tell if I want all of the info because I am interested or find it hilarious.  Either way, I think I might give this game a good look when it comes out.

Thoughts from WWDC (2013)

WWDC is wrapped.  Apple games us some bits and pieces and we all know what their new gameplan is.  I am going to cover the things that I found meaningful and interesting.

iWork
Documents, spreadsheets, presentations, graphs.... all at your fingertips... all the time.  This is the combination of a full Microsoft Office suite and Google Drive.  While Google Drive has many Google Docs features, they are not the same high-quality stuff you expect from Microsoft Office.  This actually looks like a HUGE productivity boost to iOS.  While I am not a big Apple fan, this looks GREAT.  Hopefully this will light a fire under everyone else to push for this kind of thing... in the cloud.


iTunes Radio
At first I kept hearing about how this was going to compete with Spotify.  It isn't.  This is a Pandora rip-off.  You get to hear "stations".  Sometimes those stations can even play exclusive music before it is heard anywhere else!  This means that Apple has ripped off Pandora AND started paying record companies tons of dough.  Nice.  This thing looks like a joke.  If nothing else you get to ditch downloading an app because now you have it.  However, since Spotify will let you listen to whatever in the hell you want, whenever in the hell you want... you'll probably still want to download it.  I am thoroughly disappointed, but not surprised.


Airport Extreme/Time Capsule
Guess what.  I'm actually excited.  I have long been captivated by the way that Apple has managed the Airports.  This year.... I might actually want to get one.  I won't be able to afford it until NEXT YEAR, but I still want one, now!  For 200 bucks, I can wait.  The new Airports rock the super fast 1.3Gb speeds flying through the air at roughly 450Mb in three separate streams.  This also leads to increased range, which is GREAT.  This is actually going to be an upgrade over N+.  Woo!  It has the standard bells and whistles like dual-band and backward compatibility.  The ability to plug up an external drive and share it over the network isn't new, either, but it sure is nice.

The new Time Capsule is the same thing, but this year it is sporting 2 and 3GB models.  This doesn't help us old PC users out much, but it is great for Mac users.  These drives are set to automagically back up their laptops and desktops to this fancy little space.  Time Machine isn't offered on another platform, so not everyone can take advantage of the Time Capsule.  At 300 and 400 dollars... did you really want to?  How much is laziness worth to you?


iOS7
I don't even know what in the fuck this is.  It's like they took a bunch of stuff from other mobile OSs and... I don't know.  Right now it is a Frankenstein mess.  It should be cleaned up, shortly.  I sure as hell hope so.  Considering how likely they are to redesign the iPhone for this year, you better hope you fix this up in hopes to push phones out of the door of you are in big fucking trouble.  I will have plenty more to say about this as the months move and it gets closer to release.  Until then... wow, what the fuck.

Revisiting Google Currents

Several months ago I skewered Google Currents.  I thought that it had some promise, but I was VERY sad about the state of the app and what it actually offered.  Google has taken some very big strides with Currents, though it has been done very quietly.  I decided to spend some time with it and see if anything had been done to make the overall experience better.

The first thing you will notice is a new layout.  This makes pages a lot more attractive to view.  You will notice instantly that based on the choices you have made with Currents that you will be shown different things.  During my initial setup and run-in with Currents I added a lot of customized sites and information.  All of these things populated perfectly and with the new layout it all looks great.  The main page is going to be the articles you requested from the site or source that you have selected.  The menu shows you the categories and the specific sites or sources you have underneath them.  This is a nice overhaul compared to the awful looking layout we had to endure before.

You can select a category, we will use Business.  Under Business I have Forbes, Fast Company, Venture Beat and Breaking Stories.  Breaking Stories is Google's own highlight of what has been happening.  Each category has one.  If I select Forbes I can then swing over to their "page".  They now occupy my screen.  Forbes, and many other sites and sources, have drop down menus.  On Forbes I can drop it down and select from a wealth of different things.  Business, Investing, Technology, Lifestyle, etc.  Each of these options targets a specific portion and provides that information.  It is very much like visiting a website or going to a certain section of a magazine for information or articles.  Again, this is very different from the initial state of Currents.

Adding new sources and sites is a very nice experience.  This wasn't so bad in the original version and not much as changed.  My favorite part of the experience now is what Google has added with the Breaking Stories.  I can head to a category and find some up-to-the-minute coverage in a plethora of things from ANY of the sources available.  Sure, I may not give a shit about ABC News, but they may have a story that is trending and may be important.  While I don't subscribe or have them listed to read, they come up.  This could be infuriating to some, but for me it is awesome.  I don't want to read all of their articles and find them boring, but they could very well break a story first and have ONE very well done article.  I don't have to subscribe just to read it, instead it will be served to me.

I am all about quick and easy media consumption.  While I think some things may need to be done to smooth the edges out, Currents has really come a long way.  I am glad that Google put a little bit of time into it.  I could easily see this replacing a newspaper, maybe even an RSS app for me.  This doesn't have everything and I wasn't able to subscribe to any blogs, but it had enough FOR ME.  With a few modifications this is easily a Google Reader killer... if it wasn't already dead.

My wallet is scared of the Humble Bundles

I have a weakness.

Cheap games.

The Humble Bundle is terrifying for someone like me.  When I see a bunch of decent games for a good price I can't help but start reciting my card number with glee.  I have been a big supporter of the Humble Bundle and though this might be a good time to bring attention to how AWESOME it is.

The most current Humble Bundle is about $6 right now, as of this writing, and contains plenty of goodness.  The games included are: Dear Esther, Capsized, Awesomenauts, Thomas Was Alone, Little Inferno, Proteus and Hotline Miami.  This obviously isn't going to excite everyone.  Considering that any of these games alone is worth more than $6 bucks is worth mentioning.  We also need to remember we are getting soundtracks AND Steam keys.  Yes, you get a Steam key AND you get a DRM free version for your use wherever you want.  The ultimate win/win.

The idea is simple.  Go spend a penny and get all of the games, minus Proteus and Hotline Miami, in a DRM free format.  Spend a dollar and get all of those games you got for a penny with a Steam key.  Spend more than that 6 bucks I mentioned and you get the other two games.  Hotline Miami for $6 should be enough to make you want to buy this!

Check out the video.  Support a good cause and get some fucking awesome games.  DO IT!

Google Music All Access Revisited

I've had a little more time to spend with Google Music All Access.  I have even branched out and tried a couple of things to make the experience better.

The first thing I did was pick up this sweet "app" from vhanla.  While it basically just does what a browser does it seems to suffer less from the memory explosion of Chrome, not to mention it has options on when to dump memory, too.  There are actually a lot of neat features.  The latest version seems to add support for this latest feature that came out of I/O.  This has been around for a while and people seem to enjoy it.  I'm a bit of a minimalist, so it is nice to see that even though it is something else I've got to have running that I can smash it into a tiny attractive frame and put it somewhere that isn't going to bother me.  Kudos to my buddy Billy for keeping an eye out for something to unfuckify my life.

The second thing was try out an iOS app that supports this feature.  When I described the absolute disaster of using the Android version, I could have never imagined that an experience could exist that was even more poor.  This is that experience.  Don't get me wrong, the app isn't really all that bad, it just isn't good... at all.  The app does support Google Music All Access. It does work for the most part.  It does pretty much everything that it needs to.  The design is cluttered and kind of ugly.  The navigation is a little weird.  I don't hate it, but I'd have a hard time recommending it.  I blame Google, though.  If they would just release an app we wouldn't have to deal with these knock-offs.  The Wal-Mart version of an official Google app never offers quite the experience you hope for.  Trust me... I've got a Windows Phone.

The final thing is really put the thing through the paces.  The servers are kind of slow.  Maybe they are ramping it up, I don't know.  I am getting more and more frustrated by the stutter that is caused when loading anything that might require an ounce of processing power.  While I notice this much less using vhanla's alternative, it is still there.  It makes me want to rip my hair out.  There have been times when I have to actually STOP doing what I am doing so that I can open Spotify and load up THE SAME FUCKING SONGS.  ERGH!

I still have the ultimate faith in this product, but I am not impressed with it thus far.  I am hoping that by the holiday season I will be smitten and completely absorbed into the Android camp again.

Google Play Music All Access Review

I am a Spotify user.  I like it.  My wife likes it.  I LOVE Google, though.  I am not, however, in love with Google's latest product that is designed to compete with these products like Spotify.

Spotify isn't perfect.  It is far from it.  A lot of music isn't available.  Not every artist is available, and I'm not even talking like indie or underground bands.  Bands such as Tool are not present on Spotify.  Yeah I know that aren't as popular as they were a decade or so again, but they are still "famous" and not present.  There are other products that offer similar things for a similar price.  Rhapsody and Rdio are two other big players in this space.  Rhapsody peaked, for me, a LONG time ago.  They have since broken up with Real Networks and have attempted to modernize.  Not in a way that I liked, so I ditched that service.  My brother is a big supporter of Rdio and utilizes a feature available so that he can provide my father with music and they can still have separate accounts... sort of.  My brother pays a small extra fee so that my father can piggy back on the account, and so that his music and recently plays aren't reflected on my brother's profile.

I use Spotify because it is easy.  My wife has playlists that I create for her and then download or show her how to select on her iPhone and I normally use the Windows 8 app on my PC.  I will stream during my nightly workout, but the application is pretty bareboned and not that great on my WP8 or Android device.  Spotify allows me to have music wherever I go and I'm not stuck with a Pandora style station, I can listen to whatever I want.  It's awesome.

I love Google, though.  When I heard that Google was going to be bringing out a competitor I was on board.  If I sign up early I even get it for 8 bucks instead of 10!  I'm in!  The last couple of days using it have been sad and miserable.  I've supported a lot of products that Google has shuddered.  I have been a big time supporter of Google for a long time.  Hell, I even had all 20,000 songs that they allowed already uploaded to my Google Music account.  This is a trainwreck out of the box, but I do see the potential for it to be very good.

The fact that there is not an app or program for this is incredibly annoying.  Having to dedicate my browser to listening to music sucks.  Not only is the Spotify app for Windows 8 less memory sapping, but it doesn't shit itself with as much regularity.  I am a savvy PC user and I run things pretty lean.  I ran into an issue where I'd listen to a couple of albums and then the entire site would stop responding.  I'd have to close out my entire browser and open it back up.  I ran into a couple situations where it actually crashed.  Yes, CHROME CRASHED.  This could always be Hangouts doing this, but I've not seen Hangouts cause any issues thus far when not using the Music site.  I desperately hope that they ditch this approach and allow us to run an app.

The mobile application is available only for Android.  My daily driver is a WP8 device, but I carry an Android for some extra flexibility.  The experience on an Android device is miserable.  Maybe on a Galaxy S4 or HTC One it is great, but for me it was brutal.  Things wouldn't load, wouldn't play, the app Force Closed itself.  What is more disappointing is that there are no plans to bring it to WP8 devices, I'm shit out of luck.  They may or may not put a version together for iOS, there hasn't been any official word, yet.  So far you have the Android app and the web browser.  The redesign of the app is nice, but the functionality is a nightmare.

All this being said, I know it will get better.  If it doesn't get better then they will axe it and cut their losses.  Goggle isn't dumb.  Every time I think that they are slipping and are off the rails, they get it together and put out something better than the last big thing.  I just really hope that they get it together soon.  If you want me to leave Spotify you have to put something better together.